A Bond Like No Other

Digging through my clothes in the wardrobe, looking for just the right outfit- that would go up to my expectations, I ponder upon a thought. The one I denied to accept, denied to reflect. What was it? Was it the fact that I hated being the elder sister? Or was it just my expectation?

While under the impression, I went up to the window and gazed at the sun and the liveliness I felt when looking at the greenery. The vibrant leaves seemed to whisper secrets of peace, ones I yearned to understand. I stood there as the heavy weight of the unreflected thoughts pressed down on me, mingling with the bright sunlight that beamed through the glass. My mind flooded with the memories, and I questioned myself, " Why only me? Why am I the only one to care for and protect my siblings? Why aren't they doing that for me? Why can't I be selfish sometimes? Or am I asking too much?" At this point last year, I doubted if I had truly embraced the role given by mother nature or if I had merely worn it like an ill-fitting dress, always longing for something more comfortable, living up to my set standards.

As I continue to observe the scene, nature answers the unsaid questions with silence. By watching a butterfly hover from one flower to another, a realization began to take root. My expectations of my younger brother had been like trying to have a butterfly of my favorite color, wanting it to stay on one flower only. I had wanted to restrict his freedom in finding his personality, even though I didn't intend to; wanted him to flutter and spiral in ways that mirrored my own path. But the unruly beauty of nature in front of me thrived on its own, with each leaf finding its way to the light, butterflies finding their way to flowers, and a bud bursting into bloom in spring. I understood that my dear brother also needed the freedom to seek his own flower, to grow without restraints, to grow without living up to anyone's expectations. 

Embracing this, I was now discovering an attire with a gentle clarity. With my well-fitting dress, I go outside with a newfound perspective. As I approached my brother, I picked up the thali, placed a bright red tika on his forehead, and tied the Rakhi around his wrist, now as the elder sister. This gesture symbolized a bond of protection and care I promised to provide him, a bond of fulfilling my duties which I failed to do earlier, a bond like no other.

The calmness of nature, which I had never noticed, had now answered all my questions, allowing the natural flow of acceptance to wash over me, ending all my expectations- my release.